"I can’t drink water" By Corey Springer

“I can’t drink water”
By Corey Springer AKA “Narkissos”

Saturday, June 13th 2009: The NarkSide

Hi all.

I guess by now you guys expect a rant from me each and every time I pick up the trusty old pen.

Today’s article will be a bit different however. No sarcasm from me… No berating.

Just information.

So let’s get to it!

Fluid needs

Water… How much do we need?

This is a heavily debated area in the field of fitness. Some professionals spout the “eight (8) glasses per day mantra”… others claim that we get enough fluid from whole foods to be fully hydrated[1].

Some claim that the heavy consumption of caffeinated beverages, as is the societal norm, leads to dehydration. However, Grandjean et. al. (2003) argued that there was no difference in levels of hydration (measured via hematologic or urinary indices) when the non-consumption of caffeine was compared to caffeine consumed at moderate levels[1]. Appreciably, it can be argued that 1.4 mg (per kg of bodyweight) to 3.13 mg (per kg of bodyweight), as was the range investigated in this study, bears no relation to ‘normal’ caffeine consumption… as individuals characteristically consume much higher amounts per sitting.

Putting it into perspective:

Coffee drinkers in the USA consume an average of 2.6 cups of coffee per day [2][3]. This translates into an average of 363.5 mg of coffee per day [2][3]. Personally, my coffee intake is MUCH higher.

Grandjean et. al. (2003) also surmised that hydration levels, again measured via hematologic or urinary indices, remained unchanged by comparsion… regardless of whether plain water composed 100%, 50%, or even just 25% of total fluid intake per day.

Let’s not join this debate however. I’m pretty sure that long after we’re all gone, they’ll be *still* debating.

Let’s approach this topic from another perspective:
staying lean.

As discussed in my previous article (“Cut liquid calories…cut the fat.) dieters tend not to factor in the significant

impact that liquid calories have on weight-gain. Studies have shown a 300% increase [4] in the consumption of sugar-laden beverages. 300%!! This increase has been tied to equally concerning shifts…namely: an increase in insulin resistance (and related afflictions), and an increase in obesity. Children and adults alike walk past the water cooler, and opt to pop a soft drink instead.


“I can’t drink water…it has no taste.”

Ok… you’re right. Water has no taste.

I won’t sit here and preach to you about the health benefits. Heck, I won’t argue hydration.

I’m going to go out on a limb here with this one and state: If you don’t like it, don’t drink it!


“Has Nark gone MAD?!”

Breathe people… Breathe.

Let me expand on my previous statement.

If you don’t like it… don’t drink it (plain).

Enter Lemonade and its brethren!

A friend came to me just yesterday with a horror story. She’d had a terrible sugar crash that very day, which had left her nauseous, shaking, and scared as hell.

As a sugar-junky, she really couldn’t seem to find the willpower to switch to a non-sweetened beverage. So, she needed an option.

I suggested lemonade.

She listened to the solution with raised eyebrows.

At the end she asked: “So… you’d like me to swap one sweetened drink for another?”

I smiled and relayed the recipe: Lime juice, water, and stevia.

The explanation?

1-2 tbsp lemon juice + 2-4 packets stevia + ice + water = a diet beverage with a twist.

The pros?

  • No artificial sweeteners (this is a concern with diet drinks)
  • Less than 1 gram of sugar per serving (ergo no influence on blood sugar levels)
  • Lemonade is thirst-quenching.
  • It’s tasty as hell! (“Water tastes bad”? Now you have no excuse!)

The cons?

  • You no longer have anything to bitch about.

Take home message:

There’re LOADS of natural beverages that you can make: Mauby, Sorrel… the list is extensive!

If you “can’t drink water”… then don’t drink it (plain)!

Kill two birds with one stone people!

Health, quite literally, never tasted this good. 🙂


-Corey Springer
AKA “Narkissos”
Owner of: Apollo Fitness Barbados & “The NarkSide” Fitness Forums.


1. Grandjean et. al., The Effect on Hydration of Two Diets, One with and One without Plain Water. Journal of the American College of Nutrition, Vol. 22, No. 2, 165-173, 2003.
2. Schreiber et al., Measurement of coffee and caffeine intake: Implications for epidemiolgic research, Preventive Medicine, 17:280-294, 1988
3. Chou, T., Wake up and smell the coffee. Caffeine, coffee and the medical consequences, West. J. Med., 157:544-553, 1992
4. Harrington. The Role of Sugar-Sweetened Beverage Consumption in Adolescent Obesity: A Review of the Literature. Journal of School Nursing, v24 n1 p3-12 2008

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